The weight on my shoulders is causing my spine to bend till my knees touch the ground meanwhile my eyelids fill with tears. They run down my cheeks like the waterfalls of Bad Urach and I am slowly submerged in the saltiness of my thoughts. My heartbeats rise abnormally, but somehow my brain doesn’t get enough blood. I can’t think properly and when I find a way to understand what’s going on, it doesn’t make sense. Nothing does.

My eyes have disconnected from my body after drying out like the lake Chad. The sounds that used to be music to my ears are reduced to noises with piercing adlibs. They repeat themselves, therefore I scream with all the energy left in my body. That’s when my head hits the ground and I realise the effect of my tears.

A soil that used to be unfertile and degraded starts to live again. The plants emerge from their hiding places to get a caress from the wind and smell the evaporation from their leaves. The sun smiling at their branches growing petals of all colours is comparable to the Amazon forest visiting the Sahara desert on a quest to save the world.

The impact of my unexplored strength. Strength that does not come from me. An exchange of energies from the nature to me and vice versa. A cycle of life. Give and receive. Receive and give. So I rise with indescribable courage to face the reasons that cause me to fall, the feelings and thoughts that brought me to my knees. I am stronger than that.

When my body lies on the ground defeated, though my heart pumps blood out of my chest and nothing makes sense, I am still alive. That’s when I am strongest. Resilient no matter what I am going through. Pressure can break me down, but pressure is the same reason I will always rise. If it doesn’t kill you, it makes you stronger.

Published by vanick kam

I am just a mechanical engineering student, a granddaughter, a daughter, a sister, a niece, a cousin, an aunt, a friend, a woman. "I am every woman".

2 thoughts on “Pressure

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